Geneva’s HVZ to Include Real Tranquilizer Guns

        In a move that has been expected for some time, Student Activities has decided to issue tranquilizer guns to those participating in Geneva’s Humans vs Zombies.  This is directly in response to the increasing accounts of Zombies that have been resorting to cheating over the last two annual events.  “We have become aware that Zombies have not been sitting out the allotted 15 minutes after being struck with a Nerf dart or sock,” shares Michael Cooper, founder of Geneva’s HVZ initiative.  “By putting the correct doses in each tranquilizer dart, we can ensure that Zombies will lie incapacitated for the full 15 minutes, embracing the shame that comes with being shot.”  When confronted about the safety regulations, President Dean Smith stated that “the integrity of game, as well as of our school, is more important to us than the potential injuries that may occur.”  He also added that if it were up to him, real guns would be used to make the game even more realistic and “totally awesome.”  However, Geneva cannot afford to have enrollment go down because of dying students, so the tranquilizer idea was a solid alternative.